breastfeeding · modern life · working mom

Ode to Goodbye

Simply put, I had forgotten about you.  It certainly wasn’t intentional, but good intentions, as this proves, often get us nowhere.

You waited for me to arrive and pluck you from the darkness, hours slowly ticking by; how agonizing that must have been, feeling yourself slowly decompose. Were you angry, hurt? Or did you turn over with grace, resigned to the idea that you would pass without the fanfare you so righteously deserved.  You possessed a subtle strength and an often untouted beauty.  You loved physically, and there is nothing more amazing than that.

When I found you the next morning you had been long past your expiration, a yellowish hue framing your usually pale body.  Full with grief and regret I kept you cool and desperately searched for some way, any way, to keep you.  No amount of sorcery could save you, and last night I was finally ready to let you go.

Although our time together was so short I will always remember you, and the plans that I had for you, with the most sincere fondness.  Goodbye…

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(Pours down sink)

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